In the spotlight: Me

I celebrated my 36th birthday at the beginning of September. This has been a difficult year for me and I am grateful to have a new one to look forward to. I am starting to not feel invincible. In other words I am starting to feel like I am aging. I have seen more specialists and had more tests done this year than in any years past. Yet I still don’t know what is going on with my body. My weight continues to creep up (sometimes leap up), frustrating me in the process. Lizzy’s surgery was absolutely draining for me. I felt so strengthened during the hospital stay, but it has taken me months to get my feet under me again. It really took a toll on me. We continue to hope we will have another child, but as the years go by, feel it is less and less likely. I think I’ve had the hardest time adjusting to our move, too (yes, I know we have been here a year and a half now). Kind visiting teachers have made a world of difference, but I miss having really close friends who live close by. As Adam grows I have become more and more aware of my deficiencies as a parent. It has been a hard year.

Having said all of that, I still appreciate the many blessings in my life. We experienced a miracle of greatest proportions seeing Lizzy come through everything with flying colors. I feel as though her life (and her quality of life) was spared. My heart rejoices and I thank the Lord for that. There are many people who care about us here even if we have not reached the level of closeness that my heart yearns for. There are many more that are just far away. My family has grown so much this year. The difficulty of Lizzy’s surgery really brought us closer to each other and to the Lord. Even though we are not perfect, we find great joy in being together and helping each other along the path of life. Perhaps greatest of all, is a God who loves me, and I KNOW he loves me. His guiding and loving hand is a constant in my life. Sometimes I am not as close to Him as I should be, but when I pull myself back to Him, he is always there. He strengthens me and lifts me even in the most difficult of circumstances. He believes in me. I pray that someday I will become the person he knows I can be. Maybe I will be a little bit closer in my 37th year.

Here is me as a little girl.

Here I am as a teenager with my little sister April. We had just moved to Virginia, hence all the boxes in the background.

Here I am with Adam on my birthday. All the kids and Greg gave me presents. Greg made a great dinner for me, and we had French Silk Pie from Village Inn for dessert. On a different day, Greg and I went on a date to see the Body exhibit at the Science museum (my choice) and out for breakfast. My birthday was a good relaxing day.